MOMocrats Meet Maria Shriver
Thanks to an invitation from the Silicon Valley Moms Blog founders, MOMocrats Sheila Bernus Dowd, Sarah Granger, Glennia Campbell, Beth Blecherman and I recently had an opportunity to meet First Lady of California, journalist, and author Maria Shriver.
She was in town to meet with bloggers to promote her new book Just Who Will You Be?, billed as "an inspirational book for seekers of all ages." For a complete recap of the evening, please see Sarah's excellent and very detailed post.
For me personally, the opportunity was a chance to listen to one mother (albeit a very famous and accomplished one) talking with other mothers about balancing work and family life. Having just juggled childcare so I could attend the meeting, and feeling a bit frazzled and very guilty that my husband had to pick up our girls and take them to work with him so he could finish his project, I sat listening glued to her every word. I had intended to moblog and Twitter and all I could do was just sit and allow her to make me feel better about my choices.
She spoke about juggling her career and family and how ultimately, like so many of us, she gave up her career at times to make her children a priority. Even time she went back to work after the birth of a child, she found herself being able to give a little less to her job.
She said (paraphrasing) "Mothers are on the frontlines of humanity." Oftentimes we are the ones who deal with the school forms and field trips and the bulk of the day-to-day "raising of the kids" duties. Then she gave a coy smile and shares that she often asks if people are "man enough" to do a mother's job.
What I found most fascinating were the glimpses into her life that she shared with us. She was very candid about how the job of mothering her aging parents has fallen her shoulders since she is the only daughter among four boys. She also told us that her mother, Eunice Kennedy Shriver, makes her stand up every time she enters the room. (Now that's hardcore, old school parenting.)
She also told us that she was raised with the expectation that she had to be selfless, that taking time for herself for any reason was considered "selfish" by Kennedy standards. She was brought up to feel that she had to start a organizations more successful than the Special Olympics and the Peace Corps, and since everyone in her family ran for President, well, that wasn't an unreasonable expectation, either.
I was struck by Maria Shriver's realness and openness. Like many of us, she strives to find ways in which she can take time for herself (sometimes by locking the bathroom door or laying in her closet). She begins each day reading something inspirational, a practice I would like to adopt as well. She's raising her children without the expectations that she was raised with. She tells them that they only have one "wild and precious" life (a phrase taken from one of her favorite poems), and that just living their lives is enough.
She also said—and this is what spoke to me the most—that she is done with putting everyone else's needs before her own, something mothers do a lot. She acknowledged that many of us had to juggle childcare and our husbands' schedules just to be able to meet with her that evening, but instead of feeling guilty, she reminded us not to ignore the needs of our own "souls."
How lucky we are as Californians to have such a smart, savvy, and real First Lady. Maria Shriver—you are a true MOMocrat! (...and you can guest-post anytime!)












A tip of my hat to California's First Lady. She sounds like a class act.
Posted by: jaelithe | May 01, 2008 at 08:59 PM
Hmm. If I were to suggest that my wife, or any other woman, wasn't "man enough" to do my job, the women in this country would lose their minds... and rightly so.
So much for Mrs Scwarzenagger.
Posted by: Gunfighter | May 03, 2008 at 09:24 PM