Stephanie "the stripper" Hussein

February 28, 2008

Stephanie "the stripper" Hussein

My name is Stephanie.

Seems pretty innocuous, right? I can't say that anyone really made fun of my name when I was growing up. The worst fear I had was that someone would realize Fanny was a nickname for Stephanie and start calling me that. My dad and my grandmother occasionally call me Stephie, but only they can get away with that. I'll rip the head off of anyone else who tries it. Just call me Steph, please.

The problem is, it's sort of hard to take anyone named Stephanie seriously in a professional context. I have this theory that if you'd like your daughter to grow up to be a Dallas Cowboy's cheerleader or a stripper, give her a name that ends in Y, IE, or the Eeee sound. Try it out: Stephanie, Tiffany, Bambi, Debbie, Candie, Cindy, Mimi, etc.... They all work nicely, don't they?

So I can sympathize with the latest attempts by the likes of Bill Cunningham and Ann Coulter to smear Barack Obama by making fun of his middle name, Hussein. But folks, this one is going to back fire. If Obama is anything like most Americans, he's damn proud of his name and his cultural heritage, no matter how much others may poke fun at him for it.

I may not have chosen Stephanie as my name, but it wasn't mine to choose. It was my parents. They choose it out of love and wonder at the new little girl they'd brought into the world. So, stripper name and all, Steph is who I am and who I'll always be.

In solidarity with Barack Obama, just call me Stephanie Hussein for today, or S. Hussein if you prefer.

Ann Coulter can kiss my ass.

Stephanie can also be found embracing the "stripper" lifestyle by trying to kick her kids out of the bathroom while she showers. She writes about the politics of parenting at Lawyer Mama.