Our Daughters are Paying Attention

Stern.  Witchy. 

The 'b' word that rhymes with witchy. 

Shrill.  Scolding.

I suspect that few of us would allow our husbands to use those words to describe us (even if they are thinking them on occasion) when they are in front of our children, especially not in the presence of our daughters.

Yet, innumerable journalists have found it perfectly OK to describe Hillary Clinton in those words, plus many others that get used to describe powerful and assertive women, as she runs for president.  Hateful and prejudicial phrases that convey an underlying meanness and insecurity about females who challenge traditional stereotypes about women in our society.

If these writers, many of whom undoubtedly have daughters, paid the tiniest bit of attention to what their children are focused on, they might rethink the vocabulary they are using to pillory Hillary.

Because believe it or not, our kids are paying attention.

Exhibit A? I volunteered for lunch table duty at my daughter's school recently and I was shocked that the conversation topic of choice at two tables full of first- and second-graders was the presidential election.

Kids were polling each other about whether they wanted to vote for Barack or Hillary (sorry, I did not hear any child say they were for John McCain, but I think that's just the neighborhood we live in!).  I didn't catch the reason that the boys wanted Obama to be president but the girls were clear -- Hillary should be be president because it's time for a girl to have a turn.

Eight-year-old logic at its finest.

But if  seven-and eight-year-olds are choosing to talk about this on their own -- really, I swear, I did NOT plant that seed at the lunch table! -- then you know they're also paying attention to the words we and news commentators use to describe the candidates.

In a recent article, Cleveland Plain Dealer columnist Connie Schultz wrote, "We bruise our daughters when we bash Hillary Clinton."  She was generally talking about girls a bit older than the ones I sat with last week who were scarfing down chicken nuggets and jelly sandwiches, but the point is the same -- our daughters are focused and invested in this presidential race because "a girl" -- someone like them -- wants to be in charge and make decisions.

Girl power is a very big thing for our elementary school daughters.

Since that's the case, we need to be careful how we describe Hillary because you can be sure that whatever we call Senator Clinton, our daughters are listening and you just know how they find ways to internalize put-downs.

My second-grade daughter, like so many, thinks she can make good decisions and could possibly be president one day.  But if we allow journalists, men or women, to continue to bash Hillary and her historic effort, we may as well tell our girls there's no point to having that dream, or any dream, because they'll only be mocked and ridiculed just the way Hillary Clinton has been.

I'm fine with embracing my inner-Tina Fey -- bitches do get stuff done -- but not in front of my second-grader.

Joanne only wears her Bitch is the New Black T-shirt while hanging out at her place, PunditMom, and always puts a sweatshirt on over it before afternoon school pick-up.

Comments

[Donna]

Thank you for reminding us all of the common courtesy that we should show all of our candidates. I have always been puzzled by the way Senator Clinton has been characterized ever since she came on to the national stage. If anyone in the media dissed Obama or McCain or even Huckabee the way they do Hillary, the nation would be outraged. But for some reason, Hillary is seen as fair game.

My daughter has also been very excited about Hillary's candidacy. She is turning 12 -- the same age I was when I first started paying attention to presidential politics. I don't want her to think of this as a historical anomaly, but as the beginning of the culmination of equal rights for all.

Let's be civil in our discussions about the candidates.

Now, as for Bush and Cheney... that's another case entirely. :)

[PunditMom]

I agree --Bush and Cheney don't deserve to be spoken about in a civil manner after what they've done to our country. They lost that right a long time ago.

[Motherhood Uncensored]

Thanks for pointing out what more people need to be saying. Regardless how you feel about Hillary, she's made history for women and we should emphasize that great point to our daughters over and over again.